I was helping my friend Charlie with a credit card claim and – since he gets butterflies when he goes to court and says he is so distracted that he can’t hear what the judge is saying – Charlie asked me to come with him so I could tell him what transpired when it was all over.

We waited in the audience gallery for a while since the judge wasn’t on the bench yet, and entertained ourselves with critiquing everyone  in the place – this guy looked like Frankenstien and that lady had missed her hair appointment(a few weeks in a row!).

The judge came in 45 minutes late without apology or explanation and we got started.

First up was a domestic relationship restraining order case.

Pretty soon in from the jail cell to the glass locked area came a 28ish handcuffed white guy with an up-pointed Goth-type statue-of-liberty doo.  He looked like he had slept in his sweatshirt and jeans which certainly he had.

The prosecutor began to read the arrest report – “too fast” “I can’t understand you” “slow down” the judge said. 

So the prosecutor slowed down and recited to the court that there were existing restraining orders between the Goth fellow and the woman who had two children.   That the Goth fellow had gone to the woman’s house while she was sleeping, grabbed her throat, she hit him in the eye brow and left the house.  When she came back her prescription pill bottle was gone.  She called the police and filed the police report.

Didn’t sound very good to me.  

Violating a domestic restraining order puts you right in jail – as it should – and it sounded to me like this Goth guy – hit over his eye by his girlfriend – was nailed.

But wait – we hadn’t heard the public defender – a young chubby fellow.

The young chubby guy had a big visual problem right behind him in the glass lock up cage – his client didn’t look like a very delicate productive society guy.

But never mind, the public defender began to tell the court that the entire police report was fiction, that the police did not see any of the evidence first hand, that the police did not find the accused at the woman’s residence and that this man had the right to be presumed innocent.  

Next the public defender asked the court for permission to pull up the arrest/parole records of the accusing woman.   This was allowed by the judge and the parole officer printed out the records and handed them to the court.

The public defender pointed out that the woman had a long history of drug involvement and involvement with the law.

Next the public defender explained that the defendant’s cell phone had messages on it from the woman pleading with the Goth guy to answer the telephone or call the woman – Call the woman who had obtained the “no contact” restraining orders.

The public defender introduced each audio message recording to the court – the defender would scroll through  the messages on the face of the smart phone, click begin to play, hand the phone to the clerk, and the clerk would ­­hand the phone to the judge and the message could be heard by the entire court. (Improvement would have been to have the phone’s auxiliary audio jack plugged into the Court’s sound system).

This was damn effective.

It was very clear that the woman was going after the Goth and not the other way-round.

Next, the public defender explained to the court that the woman actually threatened the Goth to file a (false) police restraining order violation report – if the Goth did not contact her.

This really sounded over the top.

The public defender asked for permission to play another message off of the Goth’s smart phone – The judge realized that this was a societal mess.   Drugs, affection, immaturity, smart phones, restraining orders…all mixed together in big hormone pot…

The public defender introduced to the court the Goth’s mother and aunt who were seated in the back of the courtroom.     The mom and aunt had nothing to say, but it was a smart move for the defender to show the court that the Goth had some support – perhaps even a bit of stability in his family.

The judge pondered this convoluted situation and suggested that the Goth get rid of his cell phone – the very phone that had just saved his ass from incarceration.   But it was also the cell phone and constant contact ability which everyone has today – to get into a mess at any time of day or night and any sober or buzzed condition.

The judge allowed a cash bail under a grand – the Goth went back to jail until the money arrived.

I thought the public defender – and 4G -  had done a very conscientious and effective job and as he passed out of the court I tried to tell him but the Frankenstein guy was planted in my way and the defender was gone.