POLITICAL LAUGH-IN AT CLEVELAND CITY HALL YESTERDAY

Submitted by Roldo on Tue, 05/19/2009 - 09:03.

The three Cuyahoga County Commissioners date at City Council on the Med Mart/Convention Center became a laugh and love in. Nary a contrary word could be heard.

Tim Hagan started the discussion saying he was “delighted to be here” and nothing could have changed his mind as four City Council legislative committees “grilled” the Commissioner with banalities.

Commissioner Jimmy Dimora stroked the Council members as he addressed “this august body,” commending them for “all the good work you do in these difficult and challenging times.” Stop guffawing.

“Public service is very difficult,” he stroked and wished them “success in their re-election bids” this year. What that had to do with the business at hand no one knows. He made another inaudible joke about “wards and wallets” as Hagan jibed, “Let me disassociate myself.” More laughs. Great comedic stuff.

It was fun time, setting the tone for the “serious” discussion that never quite arrived. Any surprise?

Some members concerned themselves with just how wonderful the new facility would be. Let’s get descriptive, why don’t we. Usually, that would usually mean a “state of the art” defined facility. However, someone came up with “platinum.” Our new convention center would be of Platinum quality.

Hagan said, “That’s where we’re at.” But let’s not be hasty.

Dimora jokingly corrected the label, “It’s silver. I’m sorry.” Hagan had earlier slipped, I thought, in linking the new facility with our hospitals as “the new GM.” GM? Isn’t it headed for bankruptcy?

Matt Zone picked up on the seemingly important platinum/silver high-level discussion. He appreciated the “silver” designation but warned that the level should be “the basement not the ceiling.” Tough stuff.

The “grilling” of the Commissioners continued.

Veteran member Jay Westbrook thanked the Commissioners “for their leadership.” He poked at the Plain Dealer for editorially admonishing the Commissioners to “hurry up” and then to not “go too fast.” He noted that all had gotten “a kick” out of the PD’s confused messaging. Humor is tried but not often achieved.

By this time, nearly an hour into the dull discussion of the $1 billion deal, Dimora noted he wanted to leave. Peter Lawson Jones hadn’t yet appeared. Dimora took his bow out, however, with more applause for city hall. How wonderful Mayor Frank Jackson and other officials involved had been. Mutual appreciation was the mode of the day.

When Lawson Jones did appear, Dimora quipped, “Everyone stand up” to salute his colleague. Dimora exited. A bit later, Hagan noted he had join Dimora, hinting a bit of lack of trust to leave his colleague alone at their next meeting. Jay Leno, you’re missing some good stuff.

Jokes and laughs all around.

Veteran Mike Polensek took a turn. Polensek often plays the grouch. Now can we expect some fireworks? Nah.

It’s the new Polensek. Polite and accommodating. He has just been returned from exile to the Finance Committee. He now was admiring of his leader Council President Marty Sweeney and Mayor Jackson. Nice to see people can change and be accommodating.

Polensek tossed roses to the Commissioners for their “political courage to do what you did” – that is, increased the sales tax to tap into some $400 million dollars from Cuyahoga County taxpayers’ pockets. Usually Polensek is on the other side.

Tedious quips continue in the absence of real talk. Hagan hinted at a “Polensek Park” nearby the new center. Why not pet the purring Polensek.

Hagan then left and Lawson Jones had center stage, a place he finds comforting and satisfying.

Lawson Jones said he expected to be severely cross-examined. About what? His dancing performance of the previous night, he said. More laughter.

Was there any lower to get?

I miss Fannie Lewis. Especially yesterday.